“You and me. We are one. I can't hurt you without hurting myself.”
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Attribution note
Only community-added Goodreads/Tumblr attributions exist; no Young India/Harijan/CWMG or autobiography source. The clipped modern phrasing reads as a paraphrase of his interconnectedness theme rather than his own words.
Likely origin: Widely credited to Gandhi on quote sites with no primary source; loosely echoes his 1913 'Indian Opinion' interconnectedness passage but the modern wording has no citation.
About this quote
Harm rarely stays on one side of a relationship. Cut someone down and something in you contracts too — trust, ease, the plain sense of being decent. Treating another person's wellbeing as separate from your own is the illusion; in practice their pain seeps back into the life you share.
When to use it
- Snapping at a coworker to win an argument, then losing the whole afternoon to the guilt of it.
- A parent who humiliates a child and finds the child's silent withdrawal cools the entire household.
- Spreading a rumor about a neighbor and watching the street turn wary and cold toward you in return.