“What is an "instant" death anyway? How long is an instant? Is it one second? Ten? The pain of those seconds must have been awful as her heart burst and her lungs collapsed and there was no air and no blood to her brain and only raw panic. What the hell is instant? Nothing is instant. Instant rice takes five minutes, instant pudding an hour. I doubt that an instant of blinding pain feels particularly instantaneous.”
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About this quote
Sudden events leave physical and mental marks that clocks can't measure. People who lived through a violent second carry its noise and confusion, and pretending it was quick ignores that reality. Name what happened and tell it in detail — that will help your body and mind settle. If you're helping someone, slow down, listen for specifics, and offer concrete support while they sort out the shock.
When to use it
- After the factory accident, talking to HR: "Don't call it instant — he gasped and thrashed for nearly a minute, and that matters for the report."
- At a grief support meeting after my partner collapsed, I told the group: "Those last seconds felt endless; don't let anyone smooth that away."
- In a medical ethics seminar debating 'sudden death' language, I said: "Calling it instant erases the patient's experience — count the moments and record the symptoms."
- After a soccer concussion, confronting the coach: "Quick on the scoreboard doesn't mean it wasn't terrifying; follow the protocol and admit the player."