About this quote

Naming your own share of a bad bargain is harder than blaming the other side, yet it's the only honest starting point. When an arrangement rests on both parties trying to take advantage, no reform fixes it until the shared fault behind it is admitted rather than pinned on one villain.

When to use it

• A business partnership sours until both founders admit they each hid costs to look better than the other.
• Two roommates clear the air only when each owns the resentment they'd been feeding, not just the other's mess.
• A manager who blamed a vendor for a failed launch concedes his own team cut corners on the spec too.