About this quote

People act from histories and pressures you don't see. When someone annoys or shocks you, slow down and ask a simple question instead of labeling them. Make a small practice: pause for a beat, ask one clear question, and listen for one concrete fact about their situation. That way you turn a quick reaction into useful information. Can you try that next time you feel a snap judgment forming?

When to use it

• Work: In a team meeting when someone snaps at a suggestion, say 'We are all different. Don't judge, understand instead' and ask what deadlines or stresses are on their plate.
• Family: At a holiday dinner when a relative makes a harsh comment, remind yourself 'We are all different. Don't judge, understand instead' and ask what memory or worry might be behind it.
• Healthcare: If a patient refuses a test, tell the team 'We are all different. Don't judge, understand instead' and ask about past experiences or fears that explain their choice.
• Sports: After a teammate has a bad game and gets defensive, say 'We are all different. Don't judge, understand instead' and check whether fatigue or an outside issue affected their focus.