About this quote

We often mistake majority behavior for some kind of universal rule of nature. Just because most people do something one way does not make it the correct or default human setting. Society loves to use statistics to enforce moral conformity, hiding its biases behind the word 'natural.' Can you separate what you actually want from what everyone else is doing? Strip away the social pressure and you get to decide your own default.

When to use it

• You are sitting at Sunday dinner explaining to your traditional parents why you prefer a lifelong partnership over a legal marriage. You use this idea to remind them that just because everyone else gets a license does not mean it is the only way to love.
• A software engineer designs a radical new interface and faces pushback from a manager who wants to copy the market leader. She uses this concept to argue that standard industry practices are often just lazy habits, not superior design.
• You choose to live without a car in a car-dependent suburb and your neighbors look at you like you are crazy. You recall this perspective to stay confident while walking home with your groceries.