About this quote

People assume standing firmly on principle makes someone rigid, but the opposite often happens. Being clear about what genuinely matters shows you how much doesn't — and frees you to yield gracefully on the smaller things. Firm center, soft edges: that's where durable agreements are made.

When to use it

• Negotiators who agree on the core deal trade freely on timing and wording to actually close it.
• A couple settled on their shared values compromise easily on whose family to visit for the holidays.
• A committee clear on its mission lets go of pet phrasing so the resolution can pass together.